Sunday, January 31, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Homecoming Queen, 2010
(or the post in which I eat my own words)
My senior year of high school, I didn't exactly think my involvement in the debate and environmental studies clubs garnered me huge popularity points, but somehow I found myself on the receiving end of a senior girl's highest honor, a homecoming queen nomination.
Most of the details of the nomination process, election and homecoming week are fuzzy memories, but the coronation assembly before the big homecoming game and dance flashes like a bright neon sign among my high school memories. The big event involved cheerleaders cheering, Madrigals (both current and alum) singing traditional school songs, skits by the students body officers and school produced videos full of exciting football moments and rousing school spirit. The crowning moment was the processional of the homecoming royalty nominees and the announcement of that year's queen.
There we were, lined up at the back of the darkened auditorium, waiting for our names to be called. In turn, each of us was escorted down the aisle to the stage while we were introduced to the student body. Our glowing high school curricula vitae and hopeful future plans were read aloud to sentimental music as we promenaded past our peers. I knew the vast majority of my little biography would be about school, because, well, we were in school and I planned on attending more school once I graduated. The other nominees were bright, accomplished young women. Their service to the school as student body officers and cheerleaders, then their college plans and future careers were all mentioned. For some, there was also mention of desires to have a family or to go on a mission.
Then there it was, read aloud to an entire student body in our homecoming assembly, tucked in among the lists of choir achievements, parts in the school play and college plans. One girl hoped to be, and I quote, a "mother in Zion".
I was dumbstruck. Zion as an ideal spiritual society was part of the religious lexicon of Sunday school lessons, but there in the midst of a contest that was essentially a popularity election? Shocked, I couldn't process it. It seemed out of place and not a goal worthy of mentioning. Sure, we were going to be mothers some day, but didn't she know that when some one asked her about her plans for the future, they were asking about her secular life...what she was going to study, make of herself, and do in the future? Where were her dreams, her ambitions? This mother in Zion business seemed such a limited view of her future and the world.
Fast forward quite a few years. I moved away from home, graduated from college, moved further away to a city I love, pursued a career in my own meandering way, married, traveled and experienced a bit of corporate success in an unexpected second career. Through the midst of it, the desire for children grew gradually and persistently but has been repeatedly frustrated. Time and time again, this challenge drew my focus to home and family. Used to looking out into the big wide world to justify my identity, purpose, strengths and success, looking inward and homeward was often uncomfortable and uncertain.
Recently though, something has shifted. I feel a growing excitement and purposefulness about nurturing the life that is centered around my own hearth. Now, not only do I want to care for my relationship with my husband and prepare for future children, I see it as extremely fulfilling work. I am excited to focus on meeting the needs of our little family of two and preparing to care for an expanding family. I want to learn how our home can be organized, peaceful, and supportive of growth. I want our spiritual life to be vibrant and strong, our meals to be nourishing, our recreation to be rejuvenating, our space to be welcoming. Simply put, I want to create a bit of Zion here in our little apartment.
Oh, the delightful irony. My seventeen year old self saw that vision as limiting, short sighted and even out of place. Now, I see it as possibly the most freeing, meaningful thing I can engage in. The effects of a well managed home and a cared for family are not out of place in the real world, but intimately woven into a family's and its individual member's successes in that world.
So, I take it back. I too want to be a mother in Zion. I want to learn all that entails from organizing and cleaning to nurturing emotional development, from preparing healthy meals to creating family time, from wise financial planning to having a deep, soulful marriage. All of this feels like deep and sacred work. I want to embrace it, share it, and write about it here.
And if, along the way, this focus on decorating, refreshments and cheering for the home team wins me a Homecoming Queen crown, who am I to complain?
Then there it was, read aloud to an entire student body in our homecoming assembly, tucked in among the lists of choir achievements, parts in the school play and college plans. One girl hoped to be, and I quote, a "mother in Zion".
I was dumbstruck. Zion as an ideal spiritual society was part of the religious lexicon of Sunday school lessons, but there in the midst of a contest that was essentially a popularity election? Shocked, I couldn't process it. It seemed out of place and not a goal worthy of mentioning. Sure, we were going to be mothers some day, but didn't she know that when some one asked her about her plans for the future, they were asking about her secular life...what she was going to study, make of herself, and do in the future? Where were her dreams, her ambitions? This mother in Zion business seemed such a limited view of her future and the world.
Fast forward quite a few years. I moved away from home, graduated from college, moved further away to a city I love, pursued a career in my own meandering way, married, traveled and experienced a bit of corporate success in an unexpected second career. Through the midst of it, the desire for children grew gradually and persistently but has been repeatedly frustrated. Time and time again, this challenge drew my focus to home and family. Used to looking out into the big wide world to justify my identity, purpose, strengths and success, looking inward and homeward was often uncomfortable and uncertain.
Recently though, something has shifted. I feel a growing excitement and purposefulness about nurturing the life that is centered around my own hearth. Now, not only do I want to care for my relationship with my husband and prepare for future children, I see it as extremely fulfilling work. I am excited to focus on meeting the needs of our little family of two and preparing to care for an expanding family. I want to learn how our home can be organized, peaceful, and supportive of growth. I want our spiritual life to be vibrant and strong, our meals to be nourishing, our recreation to be rejuvenating, our space to be welcoming. Simply put, I want to create a bit of Zion here in our little apartment.
Oh, the delightful irony. My seventeen year old self saw that vision as limiting, short sighted and even out of place. Now, I see it as possibly the most freeing, meaningful thing I can engage in. The effects of a well managed home and a cared for family are not out of place in the real world, but intimately woven into a family's and its individual member's successes in that world.
So, I take it back. I too want to be a mother in Zion. I want to learn all that entails from organizing and cleaning to nurturing emotional development, from preparing healthy meals to creating family time, from wise financial planning to having a deep, soulful marriage. All of this feels like deep and sacred work. I want to embrace it, share it, and write about it here.
And if, along the way, this focus on decorating, refreshments and cheering for the home team wins me a Homecoming Queen crown, who am I to complain?
Monday, January 18, 2010
Crafternoon Project
Bit of indigo fabric, pin-tucked...check.
Little blank book from here...check.
Elmer's glue....check.
White thread...check.
Result? A little calendar/day book that I love.
What are you making lately?
Little blank book from here...check.
Elmer's glue....check.
White thread...check.
Result? A little calendar/day book that I love.
What are you making lately?
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