Monday, June 15, 2009

Getting through

To say the last few weeks have been hard would be an understatement. Another setback on our journey to parenthood leaves my emotions reeling. Yet in the midst of this, the tears and the painful days, I am getting through. How? "How am I ok?" I ask myself.

While Mr. CK, my family and my faith are bedrock during the worst of it, noticing the small and simple things is day to day survival. Perhaps it is the coming together of the Buddist idea mindfulness, the "tender mercies" talked about David Bednar and this blogging community's focus on honoring everyday beauty. (So a Buddist monk, a Mormon apostle and a blogger walk into a bad day....?)

In any event, since this is a place for recognizing the beauty in my life, here a few of "the very personal and individualized blessings, strength, protection, assurances, guidance, loving-kindnesses, consolation, support, and spiritual gifts" I've received this past few weeks:

peonies on my kitchen table (inspired by bloggy friends)...

an invitation for tea...

time to create...

(A mad mess of strippy scraps sewn up into 16 lovely blocks.)

a virtual hug....

a visit to the Botanic garden with a friend....

texts, e-mails, lunch hour visits...

things that make me laugh...

(Is it appropriate to notate seminary honor roll achievements (aka diligent attendance at 6:30 am religion class) with symbols that look like cartoon expletives???)

(R. reigning in her desire to chase the bunny in the garden...)

(...and almost succeeding!)
a few new plants for my window sill...


blogging to reflect on it all...

Thank you for being part of my tender mercies.

9 comments:

May! said...

Here's the biggest, tightest hug my little arms can manage to wrap around you.

Love you.

J.B. Wonderblogger said...

I like the peonies. Can I be a peony for a while? I heart you SOOOOO much. SPF (Sister Power Forever). I realized as I typed it that it's kind of a silly acronym, but maybe it can be something funny that only we really get. Eh, eh?

BUMBLE BEANS said...

hugs my friend. Good things to come for good people as yourself.
Your life journey is just taking you on the path it has for you. ( which may be different that you expected. )
Keeping you in my thoughts.

Jen said...

What an uplifting post. Thank you for sharing how those little, but big, gifts can impact your life. I'm sorry that you are going through this hard time; I didn't realize you were stuggling in that area. I feel very insenitive for any comments about my ups and downs with my kids. I had a time of yearning for a family myself... and then--BOOM--my prayers were answered with 4 kids in two years. God has a plan, I'll pray for continued grace in your waiting time.

Megs said...

Hugs and prayers are being sent your way! I'm so sorry you are having a rough time... I've had my share of them over the last couple of years, too. But you're doing the best thing that I have found - noticing the blessings in the ordinary days.
Hang in there - and remember you are loved!

Amy - Park City Girl said...

Sorry to hear about your setback - my prayers are with you, and hugs. It is amazing, how in the midst if something huge the little things that are going right get you through. You will get through :)

Reading Family said...

You are in our thoughts and prayers always! Lots of love coming your way from Utah!

Beverooni said...

HUGE hugs and smoochees from your old (with emphasis on OLD) YW pres. God has a plan and all will be well. Reading your post made me think of the YW theme. "We are daughters of a Heavenly Father that loves us . . ., " remember? When you get discouraged repeat it to yourself. In the meantime, I'll add my prayers to all the others.

carolyn said...

a BIG hug is making it's way to you!